


The Witcher Headcannons

by WitcherSexual



Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Bisexual Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Has Feelings, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia is Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon's Parent, Jaskier | Dandelion & Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg Friendship, Jaskier | Dandelion Has Feelings, Jaskier | Dandelion Loves Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Kaer Morhen, Multi, Papa Vesemir, Polyamory, Protective Eskel (The Witcher), Protective Lambert, Vesemir and Jaskier are friends, hot baths, not Beta Read we die like Calanthe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:55:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23530432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitcherSexual/pseuds/WitcherSexual
Summary: I got into The Witcher show on Netflix. I haven’t read the books or been able to play the games yet so these are my own interpretations of the characters.
Relationships: Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Eskel/ Jaskier | Dandelion, Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Lambert, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier | Dandelion & Vesemir, Jaskier | Dandelion/Lambert
Comments: 2
Kudos: 73





	1. Jaskier Headcannons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaskier head cannons that I can’t stop thinking about

Jaskier Headcannons 

Jaskier has always been loud and obnoxious because he is the youngest of six (6) and was often ignored. 

His parents made sure he was educated as he was a viscount but did not care much about anything else he wanted to do

He wanted to be a bard after falling in love with a traveling one who visited their court. 

He loved everyone and anyone no matter who it was. It was great for his ballads not so much for his heart.

He had a great sense of person. If Jaskier didn’t trust someone it was usually for the better. 

In every town he visited at least one person knew him personally and the others had heard of him.

He was sweet and caring but if anyone crossed him they would have hell to pay.

Jaskier takes care of the people he loves, including Roach and his lute.

He’s always moving, his mind is non stop thinking and he’s always jumping around. It’s probably ADHD.

He’s the most supportive friend you could have, always asking what’s happening, if someone needs help be that a distraction or cuddles. 

He loves providing for people he loves.

Non stop humming on the Path, old songs, new songs and ones only him and Geralt will hear. 

Always asking Geralt for his input when making a ballad about a fight or just Geralt in general.


	2. Geraskier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Geralt and Jaskier Headcannons

Geralt and Jaskier 

Jaskier was always flirting with Geralt, like non stop flirting. 

Geralt made the first move, they had set up camp and Jaskier was singing Her Sweet Kiss and Geralt just couldn’t stop himself.

Jaskier stumbles over his words when it happened so Geralt talked for him. 

Geralt always made sure to listen to Jaskier‘s heart when on a hunt or anywhere really.

He stopped at taverns for his bard, and watched him perform before taking him to their room.

Jaskier flirted with everyone, he didn’t mean it that’s just how he was but it makes for great jealous sex from Geralt.

Yennefer thinks they are cute but would never admit it out loud.

They both go to her if they need to talk about the other, she helps them anyway, 

Geralt buys Jaskier things whenever he can, small trinkets that remind the Witcher of his bard.

Geralt introduced Jaskier to the other Witcher’s as His Bard.

Eskel and Lambert keep an eye on him but grow to tolerate him. 

Vesemir taught him how to cook properly since Geralt can only cook meat to make sure it was safe to eat. 

Vesemir allowed him into the greenhouses as he taught him potions and herbs which would help Geralt and himself.

Geralt loves the way his family accepted his bard, he caught Lambert flirting with Jaskier but it was shut down there.

Geralt slowly starts using pet names and many are in Elven; Jas, Mine, Blath (Flower), Elaine (Beautiful), Me Minne (My Love).  
Bonus- Jaskier knows Elven and understands what Geralt is saying to him and he loves it.

They both have heart eyes when the other isn’t looking and when they catch each other they blush and look away.

Bath time is an intimate time for them, they like to be alone so will rarely visit public bathhouses 

They stick up for each other in taverns, if someone is getting to close to Jaskier and Geralt senses that he pulls him into his lap. If Geralt is being called a mutant and monster Jaskier will refuse to sing for them and they move to the next village.

Word travels fast around The Continent about the White Wolf and His Bard.


	3. Geralt Headcannons

Geralt 

Geralt hates violence, preferring to stick with the peaceful way of solving issues. 

He mourns his lost brothers everyday but knows when to put it to the back of his mind.

He hates being in loud and crowded areas because his senses are all over the place and he can’t focus.

Geralt didn’t want to collect in the Child Of Surprise but did. and fell in love with Ciri, becoming a very protective dad.

He is good with words but uses them only when necessary.

He acts mature but he is really immature when around his brothers, they all are.

He didn’t want Jaskier to follow him on the Path because he knew the dangers but after he realised it was inevitable made sure to teach the Bard how to fight.

He can fight with both hands but prefers his right hand. 

He knows Amazing food places in most towns.

Geralt was always confused as to why Jaskier never smelled of Fear around him.  
Bonus- he had smelt Jaskiers fear once when he was getting arrested, Geralt swore to Melitele that Jaskier would never smell like that again.

He has a scent kink, loves the smell of Jaskier.  
He also has a markig link so everyone knows the Bard is his. 

He loves Wine, he doesn’t advertise how much he loved it but when he can he’ll buy the best bottle for him and Jaskier.

He’s got a great friendship with Yennefer who helps teach Cirilla to control her magic.

He smiles all the time around Jaskier and Ciri which confuses his brothers because he doesn’t smile.

When Jaskier plays with his hair he falls more in love, he likes the attention but he won’t admit that.

He’s always listening to Jaskiers music and enjoys the gentleness of the Lute with his Voice.

He wants to retire but the Path won’t let him, he imagines a small cottage with Jaskier and Ciri visiting sometimes when she isn’t busy.


	4. Kaer Morhen Headcannons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’ve been reading rawrkijnd’s and round-robins story’s and I definitely recommend reading them all like now!   
> But this is heavily inspired by them so have My Kaer Morhen Headcannons

Kaer Morhen is a cold place, the broken down keep let’s in drafts and freezing temperatures but with the lit fires and many furs to keep them warm it’s cozy.

During winter is the only time that the Wolves and any visitors can be relaxed, no monsters to kill and no worry on running out of food.   
  


The Witchers in the keep that year like to play Gwent to pass the time, but the rule is that they can only play when Vesemir is sleeping or away as it can get pretty... argumentative. 

A great secret of the keep is the baths. Kaer Morhen was built on a hot spring meaning hot flowing water whenever the Witchers wanted it. 

  
It’s a well known fact to Jaskier before he goes to Kaer Morhen that the Wolf’s like to enjoy each other since they don’t have anywhere else to go.   
  


Jaskier begs Geralt to go, being refused most of the first year but then he finally caved and brings him. 

The years that Geralt brought Jaskier along were always remembered as the best. 

Jaskier got along with everyone extremely well, falling in love with the keep and it’s inhabitants.   
Bonus: Lambert and Eskel don’t know what love feels like, only lust, so Jaskier shows them. 

Geralt was jealous at first but realised Jaskier wasn’t going to leave him for his brothers. He loved his Witchers equally.   
  


Jaskier brightened the keep up, playing music and leaving drops of color everywhere. Whether that was in books in the library, new bed sheets, new covers on windows. And Geralt even found new clothes in all their closets one year.   
  


The Wolves are very protective of each other but also protective of their bard so if one says something to upset Their Lark it was hell to pay.   
  


Vesemir and Jaskier got along like a house on fire, growing herbs together, cooking together and even sitting in silence in the library.   
bonus: Vesemir starts calling Jaskier ‘Pup’ to the others and it catches on.   
extra bonus: Jaskier loves it.   
  


Jaskier dreads leaving each year but makes each Wolf Promise to come back, and to meet on the path at least twice that year.   
  


Kaer Morhen May be full of ghosts to one but it will always hold Jaskier and his Wolf Pack.   
  



	5. Jaskier and Vesemir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A list of personal Headcannons between Jaskier and Vesemir. Mainly focused on their friendship

Jaskier and Vesemir

The first time they meet Jaskier uses proper court rules; introducing himself, bowing, and referring to Vesemir as Sir and Master Witcher.

Vesemir was amused by Jaskiers antics and actually smiled at him, his pups were confused at that.

The two meet in the library one day and talk for hours about poetry and the ever changing politics of the Continent.

After that, they arrange a day to meet each week. Some days in the library while others might be in the green house.

Jaskier becomes obsessed with alchemy so Vesemir teaches him some potions that Geralt could use as well as some for humans.

Some nights they sit in silence, drinking wine as reading poetry. Some nights are filled with stories of the past.

The two are close, trusting each other to look after the other wolves when one can’t.

Jaskier tells Vesemir if the Countesses and Counts he encounters, and the way they treated Geralt before he made him famous and now.

Vesemir starts calling Jaskier his pup, and Jaskier loves it.

Vesemir was the first person to learn of Jaskiers home life. He learns of the abuse the bard suffered, the way his father hated him for being himself.

Bonus: Vesemir vows to hit the man of he ever meets him.

Vesemir was the only one to realize the Bard was part elf.

At the end of the second Winter, Vesemir gives Jaskier his own version of their medallion. It was blessed the same way and it also had a tracking spell on it. Bonus: “you are family Lark, be safe and come back next year” (Jaskier cried)


	6. Lambert Headcannons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Lambert Headcannons of mine.

Lambert acts like nothing bothers him but he feels so much. 

He was close to Rennes (Vesemir’s Partner, another Headcannon) and when the Keep was raided he felt responsible for not being there to help.  
  
He wasn’t a child surprise, his father had handed him over because he couldn’t be bothered with him.   
Bonus: His father was abusive, he killed his sister and mama in front of him and his other brother who was sold to a trader. 

The Witcher who he was given too was a dick and refused to comfort him on the way to Kaer Morhen.

He tried to run the second they arrived, but was stopped by Barmin who did not look impressed. 

Vesemir and Rennes taught his class, and when he had a nightmare it was usually Rennes who comforted him. 

The lessons were hard, he was only a 7-year-old but was expected to keep up with the older boys. 

His first Winter he met Eskel and Geralt, both trusted Vesemir and Rennes with their lives and they helped him train.   
Bonus: After the Winter he was the best in his class because he had four tutors helping him.

His anger issues were the main reason he got in trouble, no one could help until Rennes started to privately tutor him.   
  
The old Witcher showed him the way to keep his emotions down until they were needed, their relationship grew and Lambert viewed him as a father figure.   
Bonus: Rennes and Vesemir basically adopted him, Geralt and Eskel. 

During his first trials he could feel the others around him, could feel them keeping him safe and alive. He thinks that was why he survived it. 

The second trial nearly got him, he could have sworn that he had talked to his mama again but she said it wasn’t his time. He woke up to his new Witcher family (he would never say that was what they were) 

His class lost a lot that year, only 7 of the starting 52 survived, the Trial of the Mountain was easy for him, but he lost one of his closest friends. 

He was on the Path for a year, it was his first Winter coming Home when he heard the news.   
  
He arrived back and spotted Vesemir and Eskel burning bodies as Geralt was moving more into a pile. 

It didn’t hurt to burn some of them, they had abused him as a kid and forced so many other kids to die.   
  
But burning Rennes was the worst. They left him until last so he was giving his own pire, Vesemir kept his Medallion and the Swords were placed in the Hall above the fire they used. 

He was suicidal after that, he stopped eating, stopped sleeping, stopped existing really. It took all of them showing that they were still there to break out of it. 

He still has bad days, those days are the ones where he would rather run himself through with a sword that breathe again.   
  
When he met Jaskier he understood why Geralt kept him around. There was never a silent minute with the Bard and it distracted them from their thinking. 

Lambert finally gave into his needs, he let all of them fuck him and it was good, he felt at peace with himself like that. 

Jaskier explained it, he needed his choice to be taken, to feel like he had no option (he did, they discussed safe words) 

The Keep started to feel like the Home it used to be when Rennes was alive, he looked forward to going back.   
  
When he met Aiden he was scared, what would the others say. He told them about the Cat in the Winter and he was told to bring him back the following year.

He loved the Cat, they travelled on and off until Winter cake and Aiden met his Pack. They made sure the Car was sure that they would kill him if Lambert was hurt.   
  
Lambert still fucked them, he loved all of them and it eased the ache in his chest after a while. 


End file.
